Navigator
Recent posts
Recent comments [-]
Friendly Entities
Friends
The Others
Archives [+]
Categories [+]
Journal | Archives
Let's go backwards and change things:
– get out of bed before 2:30 PM today
– voice the poop incident in a more humorous tone as to avoid unintended hostility
– study for physics so that 97% of the class wouldn't do better than me (record low)
– read 10 pages of history a day, instead of 250 in 3 nights
– enter a major not in the engineering college
– continue to play tennis regularly and not be fat
– continue to practice and play keyboard from 10 years ago
– continue to speak Bengali from 16 years ago
– not be born?
Forward progression means finishing my Wendy's Spicy Chicken meal (thanks, Derek. I owe you a surprise, wink), listening to Ryan play Relationship of Command, and reading.
But not before I research donkey punching.
If one were to leave only corny scenes and dance/music sequences in a standard Bollywood blockbuster, and replace all the actors with a rusty group of amateurs, and throw in a crowd that constantly shouted random names in support of a friend (or several), and then start the show nearly 30 minutes late (this is Indian time, remember. Only brownies understand this point – fashionably late is almost always ‘on time’), one would be left with India Night.
It wasn't really that bad. Some parts were enjoyable: the traditional dance was my favorite, actually, about the worker who wanted to visited the temple of Shiva; besides, one of the dancers was cute, and another looked like Ryan's friend Paige, which was a bit freaky. But it was just too long. Most of the acts resembled the other acts. They need to cut down next year.
Because of this lack of variety, I shifted my focus to all the cute girls in the performances. I've never wanted Indian girls more than I did tonight.
Whoever pooped in the downstairs bathroom should learn how to flush the toilet. Some things are just inexcusable.
After dropping my children off to their friends' house or the bars, I decided to unwind by baking brownies. You really can mess up presentation on the boxed goods.
I need to powerwalk everyday. Not because I'm turning into a mom, but because I'm a fatass.
After two weeks of e-mail tag, I finally had a chance to meet with the little well-dressed Frenchman known as my advisor. Through him I learned that I didn't need to take my CS group project course or write a thesis. In fact, I didn't have any sort of senior project to cap off my years here – any class that satisfied my advanced composition requirement worked, but of course the department recommended the project or thesis without ever hinting that those classes weren't requirements. Which is bullshit.
I decided not to sign up for the music class I needed while it was still open, and now with my options broadened, the class is closed. I'm stuck with the computer music sequence unless I get lucky and sneak into electroacoustic.
Damn the CS department for not making these details clear on the website. Just have to bite my tongue and take it. Just one more year.... And I can forget about taking any design courses. ashfjkasdfk.
The only possible bright side is that I'll either take intro to international business or intermediate expository writing for advanced composition. Except that I can't sign up for either at the moment. Lucky me.
Bleh. I'm bored. Maybe I'll watch a movie on my new DVD player.
Oh, here's a good recipe of something before I go: take three eggs and mix in some chopped green onions, hot green chiles, dashes of salt & pepper, and small cut-up chunks of your favorite pepperjack cheese. In a large nonstick skillet melt 1.5 tbsp of Country Crock (or, for the bold, pure butter) and pour in the egg batter. Let it cook for a few minutes, then fold in half with your favorite spatula. Flip and cook the other side for a few minutes, then flip again, then cut in half. Toast a pair of onion-flavored buns, spread a bit of butter on each one, then insert an omelette half. Chew chew chew. Finish and repeat toasting procedure for the second half. It's yum yum.
Why do my pants get tighter with each passing week?
Tonight I attended a symposium on what I thought would be Bush's ‘War on Terror’ bullshit, but apparently my poli sci professor didn't know that Theda Skocpol was talking about two different subjects today: the more WoT-centric symposium was at 3, and I spent an hour nodding off in the very nice Beckman Auditorium to talk about the level of civic volunteerism during war. Fascinating.
On my way home, I stopped inside DCL for a quick warming, browsing the flyers for a potential job and stopping at a display case showcasing different software and the names of UIUC graduates involved in the development. Of course there was Mosaic, but also Eudora, Microsoft Flight Simulator, Descent, a few others things, and Mortal Kombat: Ed Boon was from UIUC! This thought bounced around my head as I headed back out, hood up.
I was waiting to cross the street, and everything to my left was clear for a good stretch. As the final car from my right was about to pass me, I started to cross. Once I got into the far lane, I saw that a car was maybe 30 ft from me in the close lane. I didn't think to look left again.
This obviously hasn't happened before, or else I'd be crippled/dead by now. Jaywalking is life. Stupid hood. At least my peripherals would have picked up oncoming lights without it.
Oh, and Derek took a mighty stab at my water bottle not too long ago, which was situated a few inches from my body. So I splashed the water back onto him instead of a more logical recourse: the hurling of a one gallon-filled object. Ah well. Perhaps next time.
Two bad omens in one night. I think I'll make instant mocha now.
After skipping another history quiz due to insufficient knowledge, barely completing half my programming assignment, not studying for my physics exam (blind guessing with a touch of knowledge won't necessarily get you far), and spending roughly 50 of the last 62 hours awake (15 of which involved any real work), I've come to further hate myself.
Freezing in April. Unhappy. But I ate a gyro for dinner.
I just found out you can edit them in Edit Options › Preferences. Yay, I think.
If my pessimism is a downer, try this! I had to ask Ryan a question, but I wanted to say it in a way I couldn't replicate in person.
Really, today (yesterday) was mostly pleasant.
I had high hopes of sharing my day: of soundly sleeping after two weeks of uneasiness; of waking an hour early, to a cold and sun remiscent of a beautiful, breathtaking autumn day; of finding a clean kitchen countertop and sink; of NPR's playing of upbeat ‘classical’ music (including Leroy Arnold's ‘The Typewriter’ – interesting); of my trip to Meijer to buy donuts and, naturally, other food items (boxed rices, brownie mix, eggs, etc.) while pushing around a heavy, purely metal two-baby-seater cart pulled in haste from outside; of picking up my $53 print for 3d imaging and not seeing my cutie; of having most everyone in the class liking my project yet not having a clue as to what it was, and, consequently, emitting a totally negative attitude of the world; of convincing Derek to let me babysit his fighting fish San Francisco for its own sake.
I can't do that. Yesterday's today is gone in a flurry of wasted time. There are two cups of coffee and a donut in my stomach and much physics to be learned, on top of an MP due tomorrow at 5. Oh, and I'm tired. I will wrap things up now with a letter to the State Journal-Register's Op-Ed section, and my rebuttal (which I hope will get published):
Dear Editor,
Clarence Page in his column recited a familiar theme with his headline: "Islam is not the enemy." Could he also write a column that says: "Islam is a friend of America"? I doubt it. Islam is not the friend of freedom.
Whatever apologists for Islam might say, the face of Islam is not a peaceful one for non-Muslims where Islam is in control.
The face of Islam is in Saudi Arabia, where a Muslim is subject to death if he becomes a Christian and Christians are jailed for openly speaking about their faith. The face of Islam is in Sudan, where Islamic slavery is practiced and apparently approved by the Islamic world. The face of Islam is in Indonesia, where Jihad warriors are moving island to island in an attempt to wipe out Christianity. All this is an application of Sharia — Islamic Law — not by a few radicals, but by standing Islamic governments.
An article in the State Journal-Register not long ago quoted a Muslim, who said, "Every Muslim is for Sharia." I would like to hear Muslim citizens and guests in this country assure us they do not want Sharia for America – even Muslim Americans.
I have had contact with Muslim people. They have always been most kind and helpful, and appear to be very hard-working folks. I have always been treated with the utmost courtesy and respect. But I don't want to imagine an America with a Muslim majority.
Eddie Bratton
Petersburg
…
Dear Editor,
Eddie Bratton's response to Islam as an enemy to freedom is a very close-minded look at Qur'anic teachings.
Through Mr. Bratton's logic, I can justify that Christianity is perilous to freedom in this world: Christopher Columbus forced conversions and enslaved natives of this continent; Hitler's fanatical Christian beliefs sparked the Holocaust; the Catholic Church has protected child molestors. Is this the result of Christianity?
Of course not. These people of authority abused their powers under the guise of religion. No one can infer that a cruel ruler speaks for a religion. The Qur'an is available to anyone, yet few anti-Islamic people will investigate it: they turn to the examples of Sadaam or Osama for 'facts.'
Yes, Islam allows for slavery, though it does not promote it: the Qu'ran teaches that slaves are to be treated as humans and promotes the overall emancipation of slaves, an idea clearly disregarded during the history of this country. It does not, however, allow for any punishment of converting to or believing in a different faith.
On this alone, Bratton's claims are laughable; skeptics should read the Qur'an before making a blind assault on Islam.
Of course there was much more I wanted to say, such as US interest in constructing oil lines through Afghanistan (a convenient attack followed one month after Enron officials spoke with the Taliban, and to the best of my knowledge, no one has claimed that bin Laden is absolutely behind the attacks; they still used ‘suspected’ when referring to him a few weeks ago), as well as America's support of creating Israel (nothing exudes freedom more than kicking people out of their homes and giving it to Europeans). I could have talked about the experiment on the Tuskegee Airmen, purposely injected with syphilis and blacklisted from all non-approved doctors (this was carried out by one branch of the government).
I would have loved to include those bits of information, just to raise doubt on what exactly freedom means when supporting this country. Of course, the 200 word limit (which Bratton clearly went over) was constraining. They didn't publish my last letter.
This day started off so beautifully. I had high hopes.
I received a University mass e-mail today. The content? A condom recall issued by Trojan for a batch sent to UIUC. Ahahaha. Well, here's the e-mail that's sure to worry countless couples on campus:
From: "Dr. Ivana Fukalot, MD Asst Dir.McKinley Health Center" <ivanafuk@uiuc.edu>
Subject: MASSMAIL - Emergency Condom Recall
Reply-to: ivanafuk@uiuc.edu
To all University students:
It has recently come to the attention of the McKinley Health Center Staff that a recent batch of condoms purchased and already in partial distribution on campus may be defective. According to Trojan, the manufacturer of the condoms, several thousand condoms distributed to the University of Illinois may have inappropriately passed the quality control tests at their production facility.
The recall affects all Trojan brand condoms of the normal, non-ribbed, variety. If you have received such condoms from McKinley or the McKinley Resource Center since February 3rd, you are strongly advised to take the following actions:
If you have used such condoms there is small probability that microscopic holes may have prevented the condom from performing effectively. To determine if your pack of condoms was part of the batch that inappropriately passed the quality control tests, please take the following steps immediately:
1.) Remove an unused condom from its wrapper.
2.) Fully unroll and stretch the condom and rotate it looking for the lot numbers imprinted near the base of the condom.
3.) Alternatively, place your mouth on the condom and gently exhale, inflating the condom to reveal the lot numbers.
If the beginning of the lot numbers starts with:
31337-H4Ck
you may have a condom from the defective batch.
Trojan has requested that we collect all unused condoms from this batch and return them immediately for testing and disposal. If you are unsure as to whether the condom pack you possess is affected or not please follow the return instructions below.
Drop points have been conventiently setup at McKinley Health center and the McKinley Resource Center. For your convinience we have also arranged for the tuition drop boxes both in the Illini Union and the Henry Administration building to be opened for condom collection.
We deeply regret this incident and we realize this situation may have many serious implications. If you have any further questions we urge you to contact the McKinley Health Center.
Sincerely,
Dr. Ivana Fukalot, MD
Asst. Director of McKinley Health Center
This mailing approved by:
The Office of the Vice Chancellor for Student Affairs
Apparently, I'm one of the few who found this quite amusing and humorous. Sadistic? Maybe, but people will see eventually. At least anyone with a discerning eye and a familiarity with lingo.
What a wonderful, wonderful morning.
(You April fools. Ahahaha.)
