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Thanks to Toby for lending me his earphones. Relationship of Command played on repeat five times during the last four hours of work.
There was fresh homebaked brownies in the office. I was the first to cut into it.
I was a bag unloading, book shelfing machine. So efficient. I will be missed for that, along with being a nice guy and someone to talk to from time to time. I feel a bit guilty for getting praise. Maybe I'm confusing guilt with shyness. I dunno.
Too bad Dan can't work at my new job. I would like him as a coworker.
Sweat. Mocha, so no lunch yet. No time for jumproping now. Tired.
Blah. There's a bug in my brain.
I need to get lifted. And finish this mix compact disc.
iluvmytummy2: haha
—
Auto response from express kaiser: a hater asked his hated, "do you hate yourself more than you hate me?" the hated replied..."i have hated to myself and i hate for you. i've disappeared from myself and my hates. i am present only for hate. i have forgotten all of my hate...but from knowing you i know annoyance and thus hatred. i have lost my hate...but from your power i am able. i hate myself. i hate you. i hate you. i hate myself."
;-)
—
iluvmytummy2: now that is what i call a hate mood
…
Razanova: I'm diggin the hate occurring here.
—
Auto response from express kaiser: a hater asked his hated, "do you hate yourself more than you hate me?" the hated replied..."i have hated to myself and i hate for you. i've disappeared from myself and my hates. i am present only for hate. i have forgotten all of my hate...but from knowing you i know annoyance and thus hatred. i have lost my hate...but from your power i am able. i hate myself. i hate you. i hate you. i hate myself."
;-)
—
It's all in good stride, my folks.
I hate Bollywood movies. They're worth nothing, and the worst part is that they're catching on throughout the world. How any of them could be up for some artsy film awards is just beyond me. George W. Bush makes more sense.
They're all musicals and all about love. I won't dwell on the details. It's inherent, there are a million movies made everyday, you can do the research. I've seen enough. And it's not so much the theme of love as it is the carbon copy plotlines. But yeah, the theme of love also wears thin.
What's worse than the same plotlines? Hell, what's worse than nearly identical scripts? The same staple of actors. Shahrukh Khan, Rithik, Aishwarya Rai, etc. Some of these actresses are beautiful, yes, but no one in their right mind doesn't have the urge to strangle them after the 10th movie. Or any actor. Child actors. Old actors. Whatever. They should all die.
And it's not just the actors! They have the same names throughout. Rahul, Anjoli, John, Jane, blah. Shut up. India has 1 billion people of several different ethnicities. Every main male character in European movies should be named Juan, then?
Indians seem to have a problem with kissing on screen. A simple kiss on the lips. Of course it's okay to prance in fields or throughout town showing cleavage and back and stomach, to grind against guys. Just spare the audience a disgusting innocent kiss – it's too sexual and taboo.
Oh, let's not forget the terrible treatment of lower caste people. Giving them the worst jobs, beating them, paying them shit, is more socially acceptable than a kiss, apparently.
Seriously, what's wrong with Indian cinema? The country that too many people call a spiritual mecca, that people boast as having so much talent, makes the most god awful movies. Not only that, they in no way reflect life at all. Rahul is off to Harvard or Oxford while more than half is country is living in poverty. They eat rats. Beautiful. Muslims get ill treatment.
Bollywood is like MTV, but worse.
I heard that Indians are actually getting sick of Bollywood shit. This makes me happy. Let's hope it's true. Then they can start tapping into the talent floating around and make interesting films.
Learn to swim, see you drown in Bengal Bay.
Song of the day: “(What’s So Funny ‘Bout) Peace, Love and Understanding” by Elvis Costello
That’s right, now you can enjoy the body of Christ in Chalupa form.
Last Friday… Began thinking about why he never smiled. Said funny things but never laughed. Seemed a bit grumpy? Wanted to ask why he never smiled; shortly after that thought, caught him laughing with a friend of his.
Unrelated, yesterday… Found inside Into that suicide by Gitta Sereny:
Unrelated, today… Confusion.
Song of the day: “So Alive” by Ryan Adams
Due to Kaiser’s prolific posting, I’ve been shamed into writing a new post. So here we go. As defined in the scientific sense, a “theory” represents a hypothesis, or a group of related hypotheses, which has been confirmed through repeated experimental tests. Since those second-guessing scientists are hesitant to label anything as a “fact”, for most practical purposes, theories are as close as we get to absolutes in science. Through conversations with various sources, as well as my own personal observations and analyses, I have come up with my own theory: Girls like shitty music.
Before you jump to conclusions and assume that I’m some sort of sexist monster, (which I may well be), let’s analyze this theory using the scientific method.
For our experimental test, let’s think of some shitty musical groups. [Side note: I admit that “shitty” is a highly subjective term, but since this is my site and not yours, “shitty” will apply to whatever I say.]
The Backstreet Boys: clearly shitty. Clearly popular thanks to girls.
N’sync: despite Justin Timberlake’s inexplicable new-found artistic credibility, let’s not forget where he came from, folks. Pure shit again, thanks to the ladies.
Britney Spears: Horrible, Horrible music. Nice ass though. Who’s to blame? Girls again.
Dance Music in general: Girls again.
Clay Aiken: Damn you X chromosome!!
Clearly, there are more than a few examples of horrible musical acts that owe all of their popularity to girls. Now, before I go any further, I will admit that not all girls like shitty music. In fact, I know some who have very good taste in music. What makes it “very good”? Because they like what I like, of course.
During a recent conversation, a female friend suggested that there is no such thing as “bad music”. Her point was that people should have the right to like whatever kind of music they want without someone else saying that it sucks. Whether or not this statement is true (it’s not), is irrelevant. What’s more important is the mindset that would produce this kind of bullshit “all art is equal” mentality. Clearly, this was the statement of someone who likes shitty music.
At some point during High Fidelity, John Cusack’s character says something to the effect of “it’s not so much about what a person is like, as what they like. The books we read, the shows we watch, the music we listen to; these things matter”. I’m pretty sure that’s not exactly the quote, but its something close to that. This statement is 100% true. Think of how much more you find yourself liking people once you find out they also share your love for Thundercats. If you were dating a girl who didn’t like, and in fact, laughed at your entire music collection, odds are, you wouldn’t be dating for long…unless your name is Neil Patel. Now, this is not exactly new information. There’s no need to stop the presses to inform the world that people who like similar things tend to get along better than those that don’t.
Really though, this just spawns more questions. Should we really place so much emphasis on the things we like? If someone else likes the same thing as you, does that really mean that they have a similar outlook on life as you? Isn’t it possible that two people could like the same exact thing for different reasons? Should I really spend so much time wondering what liking Van Halen says about me as a person? [Side note: it means I like to party, ladies.]
These are all valid questions, but personally, I still think that the things a person like are equally important, if not more so, than what the person actually is like. Why? Because I don’t feel like writing anymore.
Through wear and tear, my earphone wires are no longer of any real use.
And it's not that one channel dropped out, or that certain things are filtered. Both channels work, but the main tracks are in the background, and the background tracks are clear (‘background’ referring mostly to the ‘doubles’ – as Sean Puffy Combs calls it – the adding of emphasis through repeating the same phrase in a similar or contrasting way).
Puffy Combs, Honey Combs. I want to stop on both.
So as I'm just lost in the tastes and textures of my hot and sour soup, I glance up to see a guy staring at me. From his point of view, I was a homeless man eating his favorite dish after one year of living off discarded banana peels.
From my point of view, it was all divine. Not having eaten in several hours, exercising, feeling tired, all led up to this. I can't put it to words except as such: Empire has never tasted better.
And then I stepped into the sunshine and fresh air.
Today has taken a turn for the better since getting off work. I don't understand, since nothing out of the ordinary has happened. Is it possible to always take average days and make them awesome?
I'm going to make Ahmad Earl Grey tea with honey and just…marinate.
Razanova: half japanese half white is where it's at my friend..
Razanova: They lose a lot of the slant with a dash of whitey.
I once mentioned an experience I had standing on the corner of a bed with my feet together, and how I lost balance with my eyes closed. Frame of reference, right? Had that tested out today on the icey sidewalks.
And what is it with us throwing our arms out as we're about to slip? Do we inherently know to change our center of gravity? Is it a learned response? Or are we just trying desperately to grab hold of something?
Anyway,
Razanova: I'm not against the slant myself.
Razanova: I prefer smaller eyes.
…
Razanova: You should bother Hannah, she's going to be doing a project where she's making a website for a former playboy model.
Razanova: ;p
express kaiser: woh
express kaiser: how'd she get that>
Razanova: She was the cover for like a 1996
Razanova: Scenester shit. You know how she is.
express kaiser: haha
The only thing missing from a package of cookies and gardenia incense is for someone to magically appear and give me a massage. Like a genie. I will dream of a genie with pretty faux black hair and eyes.
So I get acne. And it happens in specific areas much more often than haphazardly. I don't know if it's a cycle, or if there are things I'm eating that trigger it? It's annoying.
Banner refers to the new payroll system that the university switched to, in hopes of consolidating all payrolls and paying everyone at the same time across all campuses. New employees are supposed to be able to fill out paperwork online.
I've filled out all I can fill out, but I'm not completely done, and I don't know what to do. Dennis, the head of payroll and other stuff at the new department, can't add me as an employee since I'm still not completely done with paperwork and belong firstly to the library. This is bullshit.
Who are the idiots that make these systems? I can do a better job than this. I know it. Maybe I should go into consulting for information management-related things. I actually like doing that stuff if the project is interesting.
Case in point: my journalling [?] program, which still needs a lot of added features.
Someone, anyone, help me find clients.
I feel good, and I feel frustrated, and I feel tired. Just grumble, grumble, smile, grumble. And I have to start working out a lot. Always said, but never followed up on.
Motivational skills lacking. Blah.
Needing a shoulder to rest my head upon.
Song of the day: “Don’t Stop Believin’” by Journey
In my last post, I made a suggestion that the regular readers [Side note: who am I kidding?] of this non-journal/non-blog should check out the music of Ted Leo. Upon further reflection, my recommendation seems like a silly and fruitless idea for two main reasons. First, besides perverts and sexual deviants searching for “Goat Midget Sex” on google, I probably have a readership of 3–4 people at this point, and once you subtract my mom, I’m down to 2 or 3. Furthermore, it is extremely likely that everyone reading this site knows me in some way. Odds are, if you’re reading this you: are dating me, have dated me, are living with me, have lived with me, have a thing for sex with farm animals. What all this means is that I’m preaching to the choir, really. Everyone who reads this has probably heard me play or at least mention Ted Leo on some previous occasion. Really, the only people reading this that might potentially be unaware of my enthusiasm for the music of Ted Leo would the aforementioned sexual deviants, and frankly, I don’t want some midget goat fuckers listening to my music anyway.
The other reason that making a suggestion to my readers was pointless is simply because no one follows those suggestions anyway. At least I don’t. 8 times out of 10, when I read a website that tells me to check out this or that, I never do. In fact, people telling me, “Dude, you’ve really got to check this out”, makes me not want to check it out. I’m not sure why other people’s excitement for things makes me less interested in them. Am I really so snobby and egocentric that if I didn’t “discover” it, then I don’t want to know about it? Probably.
This lack of enthusiasm for following friendly suggestions is only heightened when the person doesn’t have the foresight to make a hyperlink to whatever they’re promoting, because god knows that when it comes to the internet, I’m hypocritically lazy. I’ll spend 45 minutes scouring various search engines for an obscure UK clothing website, but I won’t take the 5 seconds out of my day to cut and paste a URL into my browser. Of course, if I’m reading the site of someone whom I have a lot of respect for, or at least respect their taste in certain areas, I might be more inclined to look at something they suggest. But basically, following suggestions and recommendations is just one big crapshoot that depends on my mood at the moment, the alignment of the planets, and countless other variables too numerous to mention.
Despite all this, I’ll probably continue to suggest things to the 3 of you reading this in the future.
Dear Me,
Dan was one yard away from me making photocopies and he just had to mention that Jay-Z's The Black Album and Unplugged are quite good, which steadily brings up the count of the number of friends who enjoy it.
I think, damn Dan for annoying me with wanting to give those albums a listen.
Maybe I'll still hold strong and ignore Jay-Z. After all, all the singles he's put out don't intrigue me enough to want to listen to him. I will continue to enjoy my Del and Saafir and remain somewhat irked that few if any people want to give them a listen (especially the latter).
If Jay-Z says he can make a lyrically good album that doesn't appeal to the masses, I want to hear him do it. This is the equivalent of me saying I'm on my way to doing big things. Where's the proof?
Fuck Jay-Z.
Is there something wrong with me for being generally unenthusiastic of the last decade's pop music and being disgusted by the MTV culture? Why am I still angry after 10 years? Do I want to remain as ignorant as possible of pop social trends?
Sincerely,
Kaiser
On the cover of January's Spin is the lead singer of Coldplay looking…braindead. And he's making a political statement in the lamest way possible, because you know he doesn't walk around with ‘MAKE TRADE FAIR.COM’ written across the top of his hand all the time. Poseur.
And then there's Muffin Films, which I saw over winter break but totally forgot the next day. It'll be working again soon, hopefully. It's cute and morbid. Well, not so morbid.
The Piano Teacher is disturbing and strange. Please don't watch it with your parents.
I am tired, and though I've eaten a lot today, I don't feel full now. If humans had efficient bodies wouldn't eat for at least three days.
Someone is on her way towards enlistment in the army reserves tomorrow. Weird.
Too much sleep, feel tired and nauseated.
Not enough sleep, feel headachey and burning eyes.
Coldness without long underwear.
Debt without money.
Parents in general don't understand.
We can stand to be happier.
I had a weird dream before waking up. Eid mubarak.
